Hows my little busy bee?

Life?
Grand.
No Complaints.
The lady in my life is excellent.
The things in my life are excellent.
If all we need is love, than consider me all set.

Last weekend I did the traditional memorial weekend with my excellent pals from the glory days. There seemed to be more shenanigans than usual. For example...I still can't get over this one. One of my best friends pushed me off his deck into a bush just for laughs:

I know its weird to say, my best friend pushed me off his deck into a bush. Many people would say, are you sure he is a friend? I can only answer with, 'it's a weird friendship...' crazy huh? (if he was here he would be playing an imaginary fiddle)

I played paintball yesterday for the first time, that is a great time! I've always loved FPS games but putting those skills into real life where you STILL don't die. Even better. Laura for some reason opted out for some reason I couldn't imagine her in the mask/gun regalia, it must be because she is such a sweetheart, so I understood. I was going to post pictures of my "kills" but I'm a bit vain and think I look farther out of shape than I am (which is saying something) so just imagine 6 nice round little welts on one side of your body and go wow neat ouch!

Books:
I want everyone to know that if you are ever on a 6 hour+ drive, audio books are probably the absolute best form of entertainment next to peeing into a bottle. (which you can simultaneously do.....if you're good), I managed to survive a 9 hour drive (533 miles) to Justin's cabin with the book called Stardust by Neil Gaiman (a phenomenal movie by the by 9 [Hear that Twilight!?!]) and another called The Book of Lies. Which was also pretty exciting and recommended. For you twilight folks, New Moon was about 30 pages away from me folding shut and giving up. Thank god for some real live excitement and plot advancement. If you decide to read the Twilight series I will strongly advise you to skip the entire second book pass go get your $200 and dive into the significantly better third one. No time wasted and 100% love for the series upheld. I have now started on Stephenie Meyer's 4th edition of what Laura and I have affectionately begun to call Edward, because really, who cares about anyone else? So far my interest level has been maintained, in all fairness I'm not too far into it though.

I found corn (High Fructose Corn Syrup) in my ketchup today and nearly shat a brick. WTF corn, Ketchup?

I bought Pepsi throwback today only because it is made with real live sugar, I'll bring one to work tomorrow to tell you it tastes the same.

As a US citizen I do not want any stake in owning the shitty automobile manufacturer GM especially since they are the masterminds behind such successful brands such as Hummer and...uhh GM? Wait, does that mean since my EARNED money taken from me via taxes will be deducted from a new GM (government motors) vehicle? Who is to say that the president in power will NOT be able to hold restraint in the vehicles being produced? Imagine if a new bush was elected, I bet cars would be cross shaped and throw Jews at imports that cut you off. Fuck that.

Hows my little looker?

It rained like crazy last night, I thought it would be a great time to test my new rain jacket I picked up off of SAC a month or two ago. Word to those who are in the market, if you find GoreTex on sale, its worth all of the pennies. My shorts Dried out sometime this afternoon, but my head and shirt were dry all night long!



A new look for the template! Its about time!

Hows my little diet?

I've been trying this crazy new fad diet since last October and its just like all of the others, I still weigh like 205ish...so for all of you folks in cyberspace stay away from the "eat less and exercise" more diet. Its impossible to eat less when you get home from exercising and all you want is food! Food. Fooood, hm...That leads me to something else.

I hate corn.
I really hate corn.
Corn Tony?
Yes, corn, its a stupid food slut that gets around like its hot shit or something.
OK Go on...

Well...I've had a minor vendetta against corn for awhile, starting with the ethanol in my gas tank. When I first heard of this idea I was like, corn can be made into gas? Holy shit thats awesome to the Nth power! Turns out corn in your gas tank is probably the worst idea that happened to the driver since Ray Crock got rid of his silverware. Ethanol is a less fuel efficient form of gas, AKA more corn is needed to go farther. It also takes more energy to make corn into gas than oil into gas...hmm? (we should all switch to battery operated cars, powered by coal fired power plants! Go Earth!!...wait...I'm still on pins and needles for a fuel cell station here in Oakwood.)

Anyway so now that you know corn is is your gas tank, did you know corn is one of the most nutrient hungry crops we humans can grow? It requires an insane amount of nitrogen (derived from fossil fuels [mostly]) to grow and then all sorts of pesticides and other fun stuff to keep it standing. Since farmers almost always over fertilize much of this nitrogen is leaked into local waterways, ponds lakes and the gulf of mexico. (Lookup farm runoff for more information). This is bad for the environment we live in.

And that is why I used to have a tiff with corn.
I've started reading an eye opening book called, The Omnivore's Dilemma lately and its going to change the way I eat until I'm too old to care.



Corn is a food slut. Kind of like cranberry juice is in the juice isle, only corn works the whole grocery store and beyond. Next time you pick up something that has an ingredient list (try that can of pop) look for dextrose, crystalline fructose, maltodextrin, corn syrup, high fructose corn syrup, MSG, corn starch, and Xanthum Gum and you are looking at several different names for corn mashed and split into a new substance invading your food.

I hate corn because it still is an inefficient crop to grow and now its in EVERYTHING! I picked up the summer sausage I bought expecting the ingredients to read like 5 different meats and seasing but saw, High fructose corn syrup high on the list. WTF? Reading a Soda label is like reading the different flavors corn can be broken down into. What sucks the most about corn is that although its in everything there is still a surplus of the stuff. This is because our government pays the farmers to grow it, and grow it they do. Corn farmers ignore the simple law of supply and demand, everyone knows this one, for example Gas is more expensive in the summer mainly because more people are diving and people selling oil can get more money by selling it at a higher rate because consumers still need the stuff. Farmers on the other had go SHIT! corn cost less, I better plant more to turn a profit this year. Since they are guaranteed some government moolah all the better, more corn gets planted.

Which gets me to think, eating pretty much strictly corn in my food can't be all that good for me can it? [this isn't entirely true most of my meals need chopping not slicing open packaging] I need a well balanced diet of meat, cookies, and other stuff. So eating all this corn probably isn't that good right? High Fructose Corn Syrup has its risks and it is the number one culprit of invading any sweetened beverage in North America. Consuming HFCS can lead to higher caloric intake, increase in bodyweight, it fools your body into thinking it’s hungry thereby increasing the amount of processed foods you eat, thereby decreasing your intake of nutrient-dense foods,
and for you diabetics it may increase insulin resistance and triglycerides. Studies are also coming out linking all of this corn to heart desiease, the number one killer in America.

What has all of this knowledge meant for me? I'm seriously considering giving up cereal for breakfast, I've been reading packing ingredients a little more closely so that I am more likely to buy something that resembles the product I'm trying to get, (I really hate the idea of imitation crab 'meat'). I also am going to try purchasing things that have a smaller ingredient list. I really like when we buy sauerkraut and it's ingredients say, cabbage, water, salt. Knowledge like this has had a profound impact on me in the past, after I read Fast Food Nation I didn't eat fast food for over three months and even now I eat it only when my options are limited. The Supersize Me movie helped too.

When I buy food from now on I will be noting it's ingredients and consider if I were going to make something like it myself it should have ingredients I can find in my cupbord, not in a science class. I truly believe I can live a long healthier than normal life if I just pay closer attention to my grocery list.

Hows my little accident?

My actual log posted on the Geocaching Webpage:

TMI ALERT!...

In a weird afternoon of stomach churning I had been holding back some flatulence I was weary of being more than just that. While doing some bushwhacking to find this cache the rest of my team found some stinging nettles and abdicated the hunt through the forest to the groomer but I bravely pressed on. Of course on my own I decided to do as any solo worried farter would do, I emitted a Test fart. FOUND IT! I shouted, no response. All by myself I let loose a quick string of quick sharp bangs. While I was worried about catching up to my team I quickly signed the log , which was soaked (foreshadowing perhaps?) replaced the cache, and scampered off only to realize my underpants were not as comfy as they had been before. Not good.

I promise to give thanks for boxer briefs and convenient public restrooms. It was an embarrassing uncomfortable mess. After a donation to the trash and some more humiliation from the soap-less facilities, we decided to make a commando march back to our vehicle to head home for a shower. TFTC it won't be one I'll forget soon.